2018 slipping away!

Inching closer to the "2019", I am trying to remember what 2018 was like and I have to very honest and tell you this, I can't remember it all too well. It probably was a whirlwind just like 2017 was, and 2016, and 2015, and 2014 and also other years, for that matter. But yes, there isn't much that I remember about 2018.

However, one of the things that I am taking away with me as we all inch closer to 2019 is that, I am going to stay closer to myself. Bits and pieces of whatever I can dig out of the year that's slipping away is that I enjoyed being a friend to me this year. Sure, it was tough and tiring and exhausting and draining and what not, but it was good. It didn't hurt. To be honest, parts of me actually feel at ease and I think that it is important.

• In 2018, I spent lengthy hours holed up at home, in my bed, under the covers. 
• In 2018, I walked for miles through roads I have known all my life, over bridges I hadn't seen before, on slippery slopes I hadn't been to before. 
• In 2018, I had long conversations with myself as I walked the streets in this city of stars. 
• I rested my head on the windows in bus rides back home and made peace with the demons inside my head. 
• I also acknowledged the importance of going through and growing through the hurdles that arise. 
• I appreciated having good people around me - people who actually saw me stumble, and rise back up as I grew through things.
• I sat down with the people I love and shared a few rounds of good laughter and shed puddles of tears.
• I also learned the art of waking up without a hangover.
• I walked away from the hills I have known all my life and ran straight into the arms of unknown hills.
• I asked "why" to myself more than a few times. 
• I said yes to things that I know have and will make me better.
• I said no to things that I couldn't put my heart into.
• Like every year, I walked around with my heart on my sleeves, added a few more scars on it, bled a little more. But importantly, loved. With all of my heart.
• I let my mutu ko tukra, maya, put face pack on me and lie to me and her sister as she scared us by saying we'd get wrinkles if we talked too much.
• I also said goodbye to maya as she went back to college. Twice. I had to do that twice this year.
• And yeah, I also got this huge surprise as maya, Nikita and Anmol decided to trick me into believing maya was in another country and not an arm's length away.
• It must have been when Rupesh was in Thailand, that I actually got around to trying new tools in digital drawing. I'd be glad if this human let me design a cover for his book instead of me having to write "Pacific paari" on a pre-existing cover design.
• Getting Stella and earning bucks to fully pay for her is on the top of the list of why I should give myself a pat on the back and why people should should give me nice hugs. 
• Stella has been kind to me, stayed with me through days and nights and let me write, study and draw and cry over a handful of movies and K-dramas I watched this year.
• In 2018, I got to sit on the road and on the floor more. It had actually been a while since I had stopped doing that. Thank you, Nivedita, Anmol, and Rupesh.
• I slipped and almost hit my head on the concrete as I danced in the rain.
• I cried close to the water - in swimming pools, near rivers, near the lakes, at the feet of waterfalls, and in the rain.
• I made my parents feel proud of me when I got the writing gig at the National Daily. Also, Dai.
• But I also made my mum and dad cry. And made my brother feel hurt. These were on one too many occasions, I guess... I can't really write down how and why.
• I also walked out on my friends and ditched plans. 
• But my friends somehow understand that sometimes, I really need to walk away. 
• In 2018, I lost touch with the only friends I have from school but we all found each other again in between messages as we fought against the time zone and adulthood and excuses and what not.
• I had one of the best afternoons of my life with Dai as we watched Bartika perform live with a handful of my closest friends.
• In 2018, words really came alive, as I met and greeted notable literary figures - many of whom I have always looked up to all my life.
• Also, I went to the theatre twice this year and cried (both the times).
• I also cried when these experimental poets from Kavindrapur performed. They do that to me every time.
• I made friends with good doggos in, around Kathmandu and also in Pokhara.
• I drunk-talked to Jubliee, the cutie at Mandala Book Store, Lakeside, for almost an hour and I still can't remember much of what I told him. So, yeah.
• Also, Pokhara. Literature. Alcohol. Wrong beds. Wrong rooms. But nice pillows.
• I also got back to listening to the radio this year.
• I found good music. 
• I read books. But, yeah... I am taking 3 half-read books to 2019 with me and yeah. This is sad.
• But, Karuna got Barry! That's a new baby coming home!

See, that's 2018 for me, I guess. Pretty sure I have missed out a lot. But yeah. Maybe I will do a beter job at at least trying to remember 2019 better?