Mixed Feelings
TW: Mentions of assault and sexual abuse I am writing this on a Monday morning because when I woke up today, I remembered fear. The fear that I felt last night when I left a happy event with my friends from work. It was a good evening for all of us - good music, conversations, fun drinks to try, and a lot of dancing. It was closer to midnight when we all left the event. I was supposed to bring one of my friends back home with me because I live close by. And in my head, up until that moment, I was ready to walk all the way home with her. But the moment I stepped out of the venue, my brain sent me flashbacks of stories Sushmita shared. The plots I mapped inside my head were full of possibilities of us getting assaulted on our way back. That 20 minute walk felt like a trap. I was scared. I was terrified of what could happen. I was scared to walk the same roads I have walked thousands of times in the past 24 years. This feeling of fear is the first thing I remembered when I woke up today...