as i move through

Slamming doors, banging plates. Swearing words, screaming cries. Trapped in these four walls, full of rage, full of agony. Brought up in a house of hatred, too far from the embrace of love... And you tell me,"She hates YOU!" ? So I must back off you say? So I must leave just like that, you say? So this won't do any good, you say? Do you think that it would be enough, when I have living under hatred since I was a kid? Pulling hairs, dragging down the stairs. Kicking and punching wherever in reach. The screams of pain, cries of anger. The rage in their fathers' eyes. The pain in their mothers' face. The wailing kids just a mere audience... And you tell me,"She hates YOU!" ? So I must back off you say? So I must leave just like that, you say? So this won't do any good, you say? Do you think that would shut me out, when I've been kept in the shadow since I was 1? When I was always the 'witness' kid, brought up u...

With every step I take, they will be dragging me down. With every word I write, they will be pulling the trigger. Forcing me to step back, forcing me to erase it all. I try hard to find, a guiding light to follow. I try ,with what's left, to search, for a wall to lean on. But the journey is so endless. And I have lost much courage... Every other battle is just another loss, nothing more. Every other plead is just another cry, nothing more. But there's no one to help me stand up, No one to reassure me here. Every dream seems to be fading... Every hope just hanging by a thread... Every prayer seems to be breaking... Every breath bringing closer the death... Every whisper just saying goodbye...